We’ll start this roundup of big movie trailers released today with the sleeker, sexier, more explosion-laden new trailer because it’s been proven time and time again that sleek, sexy, and explosive is what America wants from its movies. I’m giving you what you want, America!
Avengers: Age of Ultron is about some artificial intelligence robot that Robert Downey Jr. created who is trying to destroy hope. Mark Ruffalo plays a hunky man scientist and the Avengers assemble to try and stop him. Something tells me they’re gonna have a tough time with all these robots being commanded by one big fat robot, but something also tells me they can handle it and, what’s more, kinda like it.
Ian McKellan stars as a cranky but fiendishly sweet old Sherlock Holmes investigating the final case of his life in the new movie Mr. Holmes. The trailer’s got a lot of info in it but doesn’t really explain much about the story. McKellan is Sherlock, he’s old, he does some stuff with bees, and he’s got a case to solve. Might be about trying to find a woman from his past that looking at bees through a magnifying glass might help with? And he’s got a little boy sidekick that probably is not named Watson outright but it could be revealed at like a big moment in the movie that the boy’s middle name is Watson, named after his grandfather, or something.
Based on their trailers, these two movies look very different but I’ve seen them both and it turns out they’re actually super similar. Here’s just a sampling of what they have in common.
- Both movies are about overcoming obstacles by using the special skills the characters were born with and by accepting the help of those around them.
- Both movies have heroes and villains
- No one in either movie has a hand gun. Even though it would solve a lot of problems for both.
- Ian McKellan is in both (He plays the not-oft-talked-about white wizard of the Avengers).
- Ian McKellan has a steamy sex scene in both (you’ll like the Sherlock one more, trust me).
- There are bees in Ultron’s head piece. Ultron is actually made up of mostly bees and wire.
- Artificial Intelligence is actually how Mr. Holmes ends. Sherlock is about to solve his little mystery and all of a sudden human-created technology reaches Artificial Superintelligence (here depicted very differently from the humanoid robot form depicted in Age of Ultron) and the computers wipe out humanity in a matter of hours, ever expanding into an infinite universe who neither regrets or even remembers us or Sherlock’s silly little discoveries.
- A mom worrying about what her son is doing hanging out with a crime fighting/mystery solving man figures prominently in the emotional arc of each story.
- All the characters in both movies are constantly eating and enjoying Burger King Whoppers™. And why not? Burger King Whoppers™ are flame broiled perfection!
- Both movies are desperate attempts to wring relevance out of well worn popular characters…but still kind of look good enough to go see.