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July 12, 2017

Some things I learned from Mr. Kirkson, my grade-school shop teacher with a wooden leg!

5 DIY Hacks I Learned From My Grade-School Shop Teacher With A Wooden Leg

1. Wood cut into a triangle makes a great doorstopper, and kids love sliding down sawdust piles at Old Mills!

The second part sounds unconventional, but so was
Mr. Kirkson! He claimed kids loved sliding down old sawdust piles better than any fancy playground, and we thought it was real brave of him to go there since it seemed ultimately dangerous for the state of his wooden leg!

2. Use an old mason jar for the top of a gumball machine, and also you can donate all of your wooden legs to be used in any school plays with Pirates in them!

Mason jars make great gumball machines when paired with a wooden base, and also one man’s trash can be another man’s treasure! Once your insurance covers the new Wooden Leg 5.0, donate the older version to the Theater Department. It’ll be way more realistic than anything the Drama Teacher finds on Amazon!

3. If you melt a record down and shape it correctly, it can be used as a neat desk organizer! Also, pranks are fun!

The record desk organizers hold pencils and paper nicely! And don’t forget to make sure no one tells the incoming sixth grade class you have a wooden leg, that way while you’re carving in the wooden table with a knife you can switch gears and stab your wooden leg when they LEAST EXPECT IT! It’s sure to give them all a good chuckle, and won’t hurt you at all because your leg is wooden!

4. Always wear safety goggles, and be sure never to put your left leg too close to the table saw!

Safety is important, especially when working with young children! You don’t want to lose an eye- or a leg, but hey, it happens! Safety goggles prevent the eye part, and don’t forget that your left leg is your wooden leg and not a good one to rest on the table saw, just in case! The right one is fine as long as the safety is on and the cover is up, as the table saw makes a VERY comfortable leg rest!

5) Open all windows in theshop when using chemicals like paint and paint thinner, and never challengeyour more skillful friend to a chainsaw fight while drinking!

Proper ventilation is important in a small enclosed space, and also, no matter how cool you think the trick might be, NEVER get drunk and have a chainsaw fight with your buddies! If you think there is potential for danger to yourself, don’t bet your buddy $500 that you’ll win in a chainsaw fight when you know he’s more skilled than you. Safety is important both in the shop AND on the streets, and sometimes all it takes is one careless moment after a long night of too many Bud Lite’s to cause a lifetime of regret!