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April 08, 2009


I'm sure by now, you have heard the term camel toe. If you are very immature and find humor in the same sorts of things you did when you were 14, then keep reading. I prefer the term Moose knuckle to most other references to the vag or vaje. We are not talking turkey here people, we're talking tuna, carp, fish fry, snatch bake, petting box, licking station, not a through road, dead end at the fish market, meat curtains, clam clapper, bag of lama toungues, end zone, cack cave, cuznat, twizat, pot pie, pigs eye, do or die good old poontang. My flesh rocket, skin flute, pleasure stick is a big fan of the moose knuckle. I first heard the term as I was saving an old man from choking on his dentures at a diner in Bakersfield. The term stuck with me and the old man didn't make it. I thought gorilla kicking him in the crusty old sack would dislodge the pearly white choppers but I was, of course, mistaken. So, I left the old man in the shitter stall where I found him and pretended I was never there. Someone found him, I think. Well the restroom smelled so foul that It wouldn't matter. Don't worry, I tried other stuff too. I was angry at the cheap one ply that my finger breached through and was about to wash my hands and heard a gurgle sound. When I kicked open the stall There he was. I tried to do a finger sweep but just got shit in his mouth. I tried to do the hymlik bullshit and just heard some ribs crack. finally, in a last ditch effort I kicked him in the nuts. He stood and spit mouth wash in my face. Come to think of it, I think he might have been gurgling mouthwash. Anyway, while I was trying to save a life I heard the term mooseknuckle and I still use it to this very day. I should name a beer after it. That's it for now folks, have a nice day. Beware of diners in Bakersfield.