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March 30, 2017

Some celebrities have tails, like these ones for example.

Do you feel strongly about celebrities? Would it interest you to know that some celebrities have tails? No? Too bad.

Leonardo DiCaprio


Leo speaks at an event to raise awareness about the ocean. Meanwhile, former US Secretary of State John Kerry cowers behind the actor while marveling at his magnificent tail.

Leonardo DiCaprio is one of the most powerful people in Hollywood, and not just because of his devastating good looks or his enormous talent. Leo’s stunning, giant lizard tail is a sight to behold. And he is notorious for using it to intimidate colleagues.

Major Hollywood director James Cameron had this to say of his time working with the Titanic star: “Whenever Leo walked into a room, everybody just shut the hell up and gave him a wide berth – which he needed with that impressive tail!”

Elijah Wood


I managed to snap a photo of Elijah working on his screenplay alone in a coffee shop. He didn’t mind at all!

Elijah Wood has been in the spotlight ever since he was a little cub. This, compiled with the fact that he has a tail like a cat, has always made him feel different from his peers.

In the past, Wood has demanded his tail be cropped out (via special effects) of every piece of visual media featuring his likeness. But with the rise of camera technology, his secret has been increasingly difficult to hide.

Finally ready to let the cat out of the bag, Elijah recently decided to write a screenplay about his tail. Tentatively called The Tail of Elijah Wood, the biopic will hopefully hit theaters ASAP.

Jennifer Lawrence


Jen and her tail, just living and being present.

Remember back in 2013 when Jennifer Lawrence tripped and fell on her way to accept her Oscar? She shocked the world again by tripping on the red carpet outside of the Academy Awards the following year. Then she tripped yet again in 2015 at the premiere of her film, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2.

One might attribute those falls to the long dresses that she wears. The truth is that J-Law has a long tail (kind of like a salamander’s), which she has kept hidden from the public. However, she has recently come out as a celebrity with a tail, and has since strongly advocated for tail awareness and tail positivity.

Ray Romano


Here’s Ray just joking around on a golf course.

Everybody loves Ray Romano, but few people know that he has a tail. Unlike other tailed celebrities, this obscure standup comic turned sitcom megastar is not the least bit self-conscious about his striped, bushy tail.

“Everybody on set [of Everybody Loves Raymond] knew about Ray’s tail,” actor and co-star, the late Peter Boyle once said. “He used to whip it at me and the other guys in between takes, then point at us and just laugh. He’d be all like, ‘Gotcha, buddy!’”

Larry The Cable Guy


“Larry” does Meisner warmups with a scene partner.

Most Americans know that Larry the Cable Guy is actually just the stage name of Dan Whitney, a wealthy heir to the Whitney National Bank family fortune. Tragically, Whitney spent much of his childhood hidden away from the world because of his strange monkey tail.

“When I was sent off to university,” Dan reflected in his recent memoir, “it was the first time I’d really ever faced the world. I majored in drama and just dove into the craft to help cope with the constant alienation. Meisner, Stanislavsky – those were my only friends.”

Eventually, Whitney became so skilled at acting that he can now essentially warp the perceptions of his audience through his performances. With Larry the Cable Guy, Whitney’s technique is so refined and advanced that it totally distracts people from the fact that he has the tail of a monkey swinging behind him.